STORIES FROM PEOPLE WHO APPLIED THE PRINCIPLES
–Susan D., LMT. May 2012
I keep your book in my client library, have recommended it to many people, and work with it myself and also with my husband, when the “call to transform” comes up in our daily experience or our relationship interactions.
–Tami S., Nov. 2012
Thanks for yesterday, Jude. The boys and I “Whacked” a telephone book last night, and it pulled Wilson right of a major fit mode. Now we’ll see if Mark will use the station we have set up.
–Larry M., Jan. 2011
A succinct system of communication for moving emotions into a more positive direction with yourself and others.
–Sabine M., May 2012
Due to a highly stressful class and resulting absentees of teachers, I volunteered to teach a soulful, embracing anger, rekindle your sense of a team type of class. It showed the most beautiful and quick results. Antagonistic boys hugging each other after sessions of phone book bashing that made the pages fly high and the boys look soft and sweet. I can feel and see the difference I can offer to their lives.
–Pam K., Sept 9, 2012
My Step-mom started drinking heavily. So much that it made family gatherings unbearable. Traditionally all of our family gatherings took place in their home. Each event Beverly would get drunk and ruin the evening for me. I was so angry with her and I stopped coming over for family dinners. Christmas was coming and I knew that was one dinner I would not be able to avoid. I didn’t know what to do. I explained the situation to Jude and she helped me figure out what I COULD do about it.
The plan was to tell my step-mom ahead of time that when she drinks a lot it makes me very uncomfortable. It was her house and she could do what she wanted. If she did choose to drink a lot and make me feel uncomfortable on Christmas, then I would need to leave. Jude and I scripted out what I wanted to say. I picked a good time to meet Beverly (on her day off, not after a long stressful day at work). I felt a little sick to my stomach on my way to her house and I REALLY didn’t want to do it, but I knew I couldn’t take another drunken family Christmas. I delivered my message and Beverly was very responsive. She apologized for making me uncomfortable. She promised not to drink a lot on Christmas and she didn’t! She was a little standoffish that night, but it was much better than previous dinners. We were all able to talk and enjoy each others company. Having that talk didn’t just make that one night better. It brought us back together, when my instinct before had been to pull away. Instead of being mad at Beverly, I had the chance to love her again. And, I had yet another tool in my kit to handle the situation in the future. I was able to have a similar talk/check in before the next family event to avoid an unpleasant evening and be in charge of creating love, peace, and joy for myself. Being bold and having a conversation that I was afraid to have has made my relationship with Beverly better. I thought she would be mad at me and not want to see me, but the opposite was true.
Just today I was over at one of the elementary schools in town. The school has gone through a lot of changes and it’s filled with students with a lot of serious challenges.
Today they had a drill which is to practice for when there are “terrorists”/loonies on campus. I guess that has happened once before. Anyhow this alarm goes off and we’re supposed to get under the desks, and the doors are supposed to be locked. The principal comes around to every classroom, and makes sure the doors have been locked. We were under the desks for maybe ten minutes, being silent. This is the quietest I’d ever seen the students. Remember this is just a drill. When it’s over I hear some of the kids saying to me that they were scared. Damn straight, the whole thing is majorly disturbing! All the teachers go back to teaching or having the kids move to the next activity. I change rooms and I’m aware of how shook up by this I am.
When I enter the classroom, I just had to talk to kids about the importance of being silent and checking in with how they are feeling as we move from one setting to another. I mentioned that I was feeling a little scared, not going into detail about why. I got all the kids up… and yes, we shook and shivered for a good 15 seconds. Giggling the kids sat down and we/I were/was ready to go forward.
– Sabine M.
Due to a highly stressful class and resulting absences of teachers, I volunteered to teach a “soulful, embracing anger, rekindle your sense of a team” type of a class.
It yielded the most beautiful and quick results. Antagonistic boys hugging each other after sessions of telephone book bashing that made the pages fly high and the boys looked soft and sweet.
(Combined with elements of AHA) it is a moment in my professional life where I can feel and see the difference I can offer to their lives.
– Lynn S.
I took your class last Saturday and keep thinking about it. I have had two opportunities at least to use my new communication tools so far. My 14 year old and 6 year old got off Amtrak in LA ahead of me and walked out of my sight. I was fuming. She wasn’t answering her cell phone. I was ready to panic, cry, and scream.
But when we did hook up in front of the state, I said, “when I got off the train and didn’t see you I was very scared because I needed to know that you and Tommy were safe and that we had a plan before we got separated. Let’s talk about what the plans are for our trip here in LA, and thank you for taking good care of Tommy.”
It took all the power in me to get that out. It might have felt better to rant and rave. But in this case, my daughter said she was sorry and we had a very pleasant day….